Couponlikeaman

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Coupon Commandments - Compiled by CLAM members

Nobody's a perfect couponer unless they're not a couponer
I will only print 2 coupons at any given time!
I will never try for overage!
Never return anything either!
I will strive to distract the cashier so that I can get overage on a BOGO coupon every chance I get!
Mind your own buisness
THou Shall always have a stockplile and buy more than 1
Thou shall not attach 3 coupons to 1 item
Always make every effort to find pdf coupons
I will clear the shelf any chance I get so ONLY I can take advantage of any deal. Screw the rest.
Take all tearpad
Bribe your cashiers with coupons
Thou shall using target coupons at WAG/RA/CVS and interchange the coupons
thou shall always let your manager know who's really boss
thou shall always hide items behind the Depends for later
thou shalt not judge other couponers
we shall have no morals
we have to bc we are waiting on coupons from ebay.. LOL
Thou shalt make every effort to use expired store coupons
Though shall leave cart full of items at register when cashier is being a bitch and say "Have fun putting these items back" in a self righteous voice while flipping your hair, turning on your heels and gliding out of the store in a lady-like fashion. ending that sentence with #justsaying
Thou shalt know every RA/CVS/Wags location within 50 miles
thou should drive around to every store to get every deal
Thou shall insult cashiers mom if asked where said coupons were obtained from. (that's Robs commandment)
Alwaays skip an important function, wedding funeral, if there is a big sale at RA!
thou shall walk OUT of the store after profiling a HERO(Saima inspired)
Thou shall always know who's on shift before going to the store. You must know the store schedule better than the managers
Thou shall always have a "dummy store"
thou shalt tell the cashier just scan it
thou shall flirt
Thou shalt know the keys to push a coupon through and instruct new cashiers. This both engenders trust and gets what you want
Never buy your kid what he wants if it'll make your transaction go above zero!
i get MAD at my husband for throwing in a soda, muckin up my goose eggs
If your baby needs formula and it's not on sale and has no coupon...OH WELL! (same with diapers)
thou shall laugh at the impatient customers behind them and say.. Have Several Seats
thou shall rip out all coupons you see in mags, books, products
thou shall never stand up to the master
thou shall threaten to call corporate
If your kids want to go to the park or the movies....tell them, are you crazy.....it's the last day for the sales at RA and CVS - you know mOmmy has better things to do!
movies? are you kidding me! theres no coupons for that!
Don't go to the store to smuggle in candy, just go to the stockpile
i will ditch my in laws over a deal ANYDAY
thou shalt never buy anything you dont have a coupon or overage for
also, thou shall always buy bonus packs in your deals
Thou shall always try coupon families when using coupons, you just never
know which coupon will work
Thou shall take one for the team once in a while to test deals
Thou shall have at least 20 or so email accounts!

14 members like this

Comment by Joanne (M) on October 6, 2012 at 12:34am: Now we can play a matching game called "Guess which Clam member said which commandment!!" :D

Comment by Saima Perron on October 6, 2012 at 12:38am: ha ha LOVE IT !!

Comment by KMP (M) on October 6, 2012 at 12:39am: 20. and 30. my favorite ones~ This is hilarious and yet so true...just sayin lol

Comment by chep collins on October 6, 2012 at 1:03am: LOL! Thou shall abid with all the commandments .... I am loving them. Funny but sooooo true. A true couponer. Hahaha! nice job on the commandments